Based on 1 Corinthians 7:1-5, 10-11 (New King James Version)
“Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control… …Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband. But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.”
Who invented or established marriage, God or man? For those of us who believe in the Almighty and what His Word reveals, we faithfully believe that it was God who created not only man, or the human race, but also the institution of marriage. And since the matter is like that, then who should we look for to know what marriage should be like? If we are believers in God, should we let ourselves be carried away by what society says, or by our own opinions, or as it should be, seek God to know how the same thing that He created should work? If there is any logic, we would understand that no one knows more about how something should work than its creator. So, if a person really wants to know how a marriage should work, they should seek the Lord, the Creator.
To begin, in the book of Genesis we see how God created marriage. This we read: “And the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.’ Out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.’ Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” Genesis 2:18-24. What can we see with this? How many people must there be for a marriage to work? There must be three: God who created and formed it, and a man and a woman. And this is the first problem why many marriages do not work today, because God is simply not there. God is the one who is missing in one way or another. If a marriage is made only between a man and a woman, it will not work properly, no matter how much they try to make it work, and even if they look happy, it is not being formed properly. God made marriage for the same purpose as everything else. He created everything, and He made everything for Himself, so that it would serve Him, so that it would fulfill His purpose. So, a couple can be together, united and seem happy, looking full, but if God is not there, it is a total failure. Why can I say this? If two people do not belong to the Lord, much less, they are not both doing the will of God, where do they end up, in glory or in hell? So, if two people end up condemned in hell for all eternity, can that marriage be said to have been a success? No. And if one of them is saved and the other is lost, can we say that the marriage was a success? No. Because precisely, marriage is defined as such by the union of two people, and God as the center. A marriage that functions as God commands will consist of two people united in Christ so that both together can achieve eternal life, through their dedication to help each other follow the Lord together.
Now, if we go back to when sin entered the world, precisely with Adam and Eve, we will understand that if God is not within marriage, everything becomes a complete failure. This we read: “Now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said to the woman, ‘Has God indeed said, ‘You shall not eat of every tree of the garden’?’ And the woman said to the serpent, ‘We may eat the fruit of the trees of the garden; but of the fruit of the tree which is in the midst of the garden, God has said, ‘You shall not eat it, nor shall you touch it, lest you die.’ ’ Then the serpent said to the woman, ‘You will not surely die. For God knows that in the day you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.’ So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree desirable to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate. She also gave to her husband with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves coverings. And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. Then the Lord God called to Adam and said to him, ‘Where are you?’” Genesis 3:1-9. This was the worst moment of this marriage, and not only of them, but of the entire human race, when sin entered the good world that God created. What happened? First, where was God? Did God depart from man? Impossible. The man and the woman turned away from God, for some reason. What was the other thing that happened? The serpent found the woman alone. For some reason, either the woman started venturing out alone, or the man left her alone, but either way, they were separated. And in that separation, vulnerability entered. And in that vulnerability, the serpent took advantage of the moment, and convinced the woman with things that unfortunately were very attractive to her, so much so that she disobeyed God, and later, caused her husband, Adam, to fall. They both fell. If both together would have returned to God in time, the story of their marriage and this world would be something totally different.
And finally, this is what the Lord taught: “You have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, pluck it out and cast it from you; for it is more profitable for you that one of your members perish, than for your whole body to be cast into hell. And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and cast it from you; for it is more profitable for you that one of your members perish, than for your whole body to be cast into hell. ‘Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.” Matthew 5:27-32. The only reason there can be divorce is because of the act (not the thought) of adultery. But also, if there is genuine repentance in the adulterer, and genuine forgiveness (because for marriage to work, there must be an agreement), God can also restore and remake what sin destroys, if both together put God in His proper place, at the center of their marriage. So, are you carrying out God's will in your marriage? Lord bless! John. God bless Israel!